Your Debt is Already Paid

     Grace is both a complex and a simple idea to understand.  It is complex because our human minds cannot grasp how it is possible for one man (our Savior) to pay the price for the sins of every human being that has lived since the beginning of time.  On the other hand, it is simple, because HE made it simple.  He chose to go through unspeakable agony and sorrow to provide us with an opportunity to repent of our sins and return to his presence.  Either we take advantage of this opportunity or we don't!  There is NOTHING that we can do to deserve the wonderful gift that our Savior has so lovingly bestowed upon us!  The gift is there waiting for us to open it and the only questions is, "Do we open it now, wait for later, or reject it all together?"  The latter two options do not make much sense to pursue.  If we "wait" to take advantage of such a gift, then we end up wasting our lives and the close relationship that we could of had with our Savior.  If we reject it, then we live a life filled with pain and unnecessary sorrow.  For a moment, pretend that you have committed a crime and that society is ready to lock you up in a cell and throw away the key.  At the last minute, a man steps forward and tells the prison guard, "Let them go, and let me take their place instead."  You stand in amazement and do not know whether to move or stay put.  The man places his hand on your shoulder and looks lovingly into your eyes while saying, "Go free, and know that your sentence has been served!"  How is this any different from the Atonement that our Savior has already made and from his everlasting grace which waits to pour down upon us the moment we agree to let it?  Life is prison without the Lord, Jesus Christ!  We can NEVER hope to achieve anything that will last without his help and his grace.  He gives us every breath that we breathe and every beat of our heart - how can we hope to do anything on our own?  Yet, so many of us still try to do it on our own.

     A dear friend of mine, related a story to me, that completely fits the above explanation.  He told me that he was trying to get his life in order and was visiting with his Bishop to do so.  This friend always had a hard time feeling "worthy" enough to come to the Savior and ask for forgiveness.  He felt that "he" had to overcome a certain amount of obstacles on his own and then he would feel that he was "enough" to come to the Savior and ask for forgiveness.  There were times that he could even "do it" all on his own for several months and sometimes years, but he always fell eventually and pursued the wrong path.  He had very little self-worth and felt like his life was doomed to everlasting failure.  He poured his heart out to his Bishop and then waited for his response.  What his Bishop said next surprised him and touched him to the core of his heart.  "Sam, the debt you have because of your sins, has already been paid by your Savior.  He is waiting for you to realize that fact and come back to his presence."  My friend had never thought of the atonement that way before.  His debt was already paid and all he needed to do was lay his burden at his Savior's feet and then continue on his way.  I love this story and I am ever grateful to an inspired Bishop who used five simple words to calm the troubled heart of my dear friend: "Your debt is already paid!"  Could there be any more words than those that were more true or more beautiful?!  I think not.

     So many of us feel the same way as my friend, and we "wait" until we are good enough or have done enough, to seek out our Savior.  Why?  Do we think we could ever be "good enough" or that we could accomplish any task "worthy enough" to pay back the infinite atonement that our Savior gave?  The answer is that there is NOTHING that we can do of our own accord that will EVER repay the sacrifice he made.  He does not expect us too.  The only thing he wants from us is our mind and our hearts.  STOP WAITING!!!  Come to him NOW...this very minute...and get on your knees to ask for his grace to pour over your soul and bring you the healing that you have been waiting for.  Healing from sin, from heartache, from sorrow or despair - whatever it may be - HE can heal you!  We are ALL human and we will ALL make mistakes in the course of our existence.  It is time that we stop allowing the Adversary control our thoughts and tell us that we are pathetic and will never be "good enough" to qualify for the Savior's atonement.  We already "qualify" and through Jesus Christ, we are made "good enough" to enter into his presence.  Will we do it?  Will we finally see the truth that "our debt is already paid" and we do NOT have to live through this life one more minute alone?!  Only you can decide that one!  Like I mentioned in the first post of this blog, grace is just one-half of the puzzle, and next time we can discuss works.  However, until then, please allow our Savior's sacrifice and infinite atonement into your life and let it penetrate your heart and soul!  He loves you and nothing you can do can change that!  Grace Works!

Grace Works

     These two ideas have coexisted together for thousands of years.  Which one is more important?  It depends on who you ask.  Some religions choose to focus on "works" and believe that it is what "we" do that matters, while others believe that no matter what we "do" - the Lord's grace covers us.  It is truly a complex question when looked at in the either/or mindset.  I personally believe that each is important and that both "grace" and "works" combine together to bring us closer to our Heavenly Father and Savior, Jesus Christ.  The best way to describe it would be to point out a part of the Disney cartoon, Mulan, where Shang shoots an arrow high up on a pole and gives the warriors two weights that they must carry while they climb to retrieve the arrow.  Time and again the warriors climb the pole, with the weights in hand, only to fail in their endeavor.  It is only when Mulan gets the brilliant idea to tangle the weights together, and use them to hoist her up the pole, that the challenge is met.1  In real life we are just as helpless if we try to focus our attention and efforts on either just "grace" or just "works" because neither one will ever get us anywhere by themselves.
     The first few years of my marriage, my husband and I went through "growing pains" like every couple does.  There were times that I felt so alone and did not know where to turn with my pain, so I turned outward to others.  I have always been a caring individual who was touched by the struggle and pain of others.  Since I was a child, I reached out to those who were suffering and attempted to relieve it.  This is a good trait to have, but not in excess.  I had a tendency to become codependent with others and gave everything that I had to them.  The Way 2 Hope website defines codependency as: "...a condition that results in a dysfunctional relationship between the codependent and other people.  A codependent is addicted to helping someone.  They need to be needed."2  This is exactly the trap that I fell into when things were not going well in my marriage those first few years.  When I did not feel "needed" by my husband, I turned to helping anyone outside my marriage who needed my help.  This just escalated the problems in my marriage until everything came to a head.  I was forced into individual counseling and that is where I discovered a codependency support group.  The group was based on the well-established Alcohol Anonymous program.  The codependency support group followed the 12-step program that both the Alcohol Anonymous program and other addiction support groups followed.  The first three steps deal with admitting that "you" are powerless, that only a higher power can restore "you" to sanity, and that "you" must turn your will and your life over to God.3  These steps would change my life, but first they had to change my heart!
     Growing up in the Mormon church has its good points and bad points.  The overwhelming culture within the church is to be self-reliant and to continually serve others.  These are worthwhile goals, but when they become the basis for our existence, then  they interfere with our growth and ability to grow closer to our Savior.  It is hard to break old habits, and my mind did not want to accept what my heart was beginning to believe was true.  The truth was, I needed my Savior.  I did not need him just on Sundays or when I said my daily prayers, but every minute of every day.  This did not jive with my upbringing of needing to be self-reliant and rely on my own "works" to get me through life.  My heart was troubled and I could not rest until I found the answer to my quest of which "idea" was right.  For years, I had defended the importance of "works" to my Christian friends, who just as adamantly defended "grace".  How could I change my paradigm, when I had believed in one way of doing things my entire life?  I brought my troubled heart to my counselor and begged her to answer which idea was right.  In addition, I asked her if Christians' ideas of grace were correct or not.  Her answer blew me away.  She said that Christians were right about grace and that "we" were nothing without the Savior.  She explained that we needed him in every aspect of our lives and should turn to him instead of relying on our own merit.  I was a bit confused and asked further, "If Christians are right, then what is the difference between 'us' and 'them'?"  She answered that the only difference was that we had the fullness of the gospel (such as the temple endowment) but other then that, we were the same.  This counseling session set my life on a course that would forever change who I was, both inside and out!  Grace works!  It truly does, and accordance with works, it draws us closer to our Savior then we ever could believe was possible.  My husband always told me that I should write a book about my strong beliefs in "grace" and "works" and call it, "Grace Works" but I figured I would start out writing a blog instead.  Life is a journey, and without the knowledge of how to grow closer to our Savior, it is a lonely one.  I hope you enjoy the journey that this blog will take you on, and it is my deepest desire that each reader will find the keys to establishing a deep relationship with their Savior, Jesus Christ.  He loves each one us on an individual basis, and he knows us by name.  He will walk with us through the "shadow of death" if we let him.  So let him in, and experience a healing and peace that can never be matched with worldly trinkets!





1. "Mulan Retrieves Arrow."  Hsiao, Rita.  Mulan.  DVD.  Directed by Tony Bancroft & Barry Cook.  Orlando, FL: Disney-MGM Studios, 1998.
2. "Codependency Test and Definition," E Home Fellowship, accessed January 25, 2013, http://www.way2hope.org/codependency-test-definition.htm.
 3. "The Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous."  AA.org.  Last modified May 9, 2002.  http://www.aa.org/en_pdfs/smf-121_en.pdf.